How to Develop Relationship Endurance

Endurance Maintaining a healthy, happy relationship is hard work, but the hard work can reap great dividends. Just as our physical bodies go through periods of illness and stress, relationships also go through periods of happiness and periods of stress. It is during the periods of strain where we need endurance. The definition of endurance is the “ability or strength to continue or last, especially despite fatigue, stress, or other adverse conditions.” Here are some ideas for how to … [Read more...]

Mistaken Identity

Are you dealing with a mistaken identity? Are you aware that your mistaken identity is negatively impacting your marriage or couple relationship? This is happening when you mistake poor behavior or a negative attitude as being part of your identity or personality? Every day I directly tell couples to stop being critical, defensive, making assumptions, and a long list of other things that are guaranteed to improve their relationships. However, I often hear things like “I’m not going to change who … [Read more...]

Try Differently

Recently, my car broke down in the parking lot of the building where I do couples counseling in Sandy, UT. The next day was a Saturday and I brought my son with me as I tried to determine what was wrong with the car. After unsuccessfully trying to jump start the car, I determined that the battery might be bad since it was getting old. After installing a new battery the car still would not start. As I was getting out of the car from trying to start it, my son said, “Get back in and try again. I … [Read more...]

Take the Stronger Couples 365 Challenge

The year is coming to an end and this is the time when many people naturally reflect on their lives and decide what changes need to be made. Often the goals for the new year are focused on individual pursuits. This coming year, instead of focusing on improving yourself, make this coming year a time to focus on strengthening your couple relationship. I am challenging all couples to take our Stronger Couples 365 challenge. The challenge is this: Every day next year, make a conscious choice to … [Read more...]

Stop the Relationship Wrestling

Take down–two points. Reversal–two points. Pin–for the win. These are all things I witnessed at my son’s most recent wrestling tournament. As I sat and watched my son wrestle, I couldn’t help but think that I see a similar pattern of verbal and emotional behavior from many of the couples I have seen in my office. Each of these couples seem more concerned with taking down their partner or finding a reversal or a comeback. While some partners will go to great lengths to get the pin and get the … [Read more...]

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