Why “I’m BORED” Might Be One Of The Best Things You’ll Hear Your Kids Say This Summer!

    Summertime and boredom often seem to go hand-in-hand at our house! Like most parents, I wince a little when I hear those words, in part because I spent many years falsely believing that “good moms” took on the role of cruise-director for their kids’ lives. I REALLY wanted to be a “good mom” so I went to great lengths to make sure my kids weren’t bored. Camps, lessons, daily scheduled activities, we did it all! Don’t get me wrong - camps, lessons and daily activities … [Read more...]

Supporting Children When Parents Divorce – Part Three

COMMUNICATION BASICS FOR CO-PARENTING Research shows that children of divorced couples who follow co-parenting principles can develop emotional resilience and maintain healthy connections with both parents. What is Co-Parenting? When divorced couples agree to share the responsibilities for raising their children and support each other’s efforts to do so, they are committing to the idea of co-parenting. Ensuring that children are provided opportunities to maintain a stable relationship … [Read more...]

Supporting Children When Parents Divorce – Part Two

Emotional boundaries can be difficult to establish and maintain during divorce. Unfortunately, a byproduct of this can be that children find themselves thrust into adult roles, sometimes becoming emotional caretakers for their parents or siblings. I like to share this Bill of Rights with kids and their parents when discussing emotional boundaries. It can also be a good foundation for parents who are developing co-parenting strategies. Children’s Bill of Rights In Divorce Every child whose … [Read more...]

Supporting Children When Parents Divorce – Part 1

Divorce impacts children; even adult children of parents who divorce often report struggling with the dissolution of their parents’ marriage. The most vulnerable individuals in family dealing with divorce are the dependent children. When I work with kids whose parents are splitting up, we often start by learning and implementing the “7 C’s,” listed below: I didn’t CAUSE it. I can’t CURE it. I can’t CONTROL it. I can CARE for myself By COMMUNICATING my feelings, Making … [Read more...]

Feeling Understood: The Importance of Validation

    We all want to feel understood and valued. When we sense that others understand our perspective, we feel safer in relationships and more confident in general. Paradoxically, although we inherently crave understanding, we don’t intuitively know how to attain it. Indulge me as a bibliophile for a moment: this universal desire to understand those we love, and to feel understood by them, is a prominent literary theme. All levels of readers relate to this internal drive; we … [Read more...]