There are many different types of relationships ranging anywhere from strangers and acquaintances to friends, family, or spouse. If any of these people ask how you are doing, in the spilt second of your response, you are faced with how to answer the question. You may evaluate who is asking the question, how safe you feel in that relationship, how much time you have, the sincerity of the asker, or your willingness to share. If the question is coming from someone that you hardly know, your answer may differ dramatically from the answer to the same question coming from a very close friend.

When you invite people into your emotional space by choosing to share more and risk being more known, the potential for relational joy and sorrow both increase. Meaningful relationships are one of life’s greatest joys. Be it the birth of a child, an enduring friendship, a trusted partnership, or a close and resilient marriage. Withholding information can offer protection and risk feeling unknown or lonely. The art of relational decision-making can increase your sense of love and belonging.

Conflict in and loss of close relationships are among the most stressful of life events. The reason why they are so stressful is because it is human to sorrow for that which has been your joy. Everyone who has a relationship is at risk for a loss, and this means that a person does not have to be mentally ill or meet diagnostic criteria to benefit from relational therapy.

I believe if you can find the right fit in your therapist, that every person or relationship could use a confidential and emotionally safe space to work through life’s stressors. The stigmas about therapy are diminishing as everyday people find benefit in sharing their stories of relational loss, shame, and joy and finding relief.